A non-profit adoptive family support center
Serving families, professionals and educators since 1998

Best Of
 

 

7 Core
Adoptee    |
  ADOPTEE

clear

LOSS
Fears ultimate abandonment
Loss of biological, genetic, and cultural history
Issues of holding on and letting go

clear

REJECTION
Placement for adoption as a personal rejection
Can only be “chosen” if first rejected
Issues of self-esteem
Anticipates rejection
Misperceives situations

clear

GUILT / SHAME
Feels deserving of misfortune
Ashamed of being different
May take defensive stance
Anger

clear

GRIEF
Grief overlooked in childhood or blocked by adult leading to depression and acting out
May grieve lack of “fit” in adoptive family

clear

IDENTITY
Deficits in information about birth parents, birthplace, etc. may impede integration of identity
May seek identity in early pregnancies or extreme behaviors in order to create a sense of belonging

clear

INTIMACY & RELATIONSHIPS
Fears getting close and risking reenactment of earlier losses
Concerns over possible incest (e.g. with an unrecognized sibling)
Bonding issues may lower capacity for intimacy

CONTROL / GAINS
Adoption alters life course
Aware of not being a party to initial adoption decisions, in which adults made life-altering choices
Haphazard nature of adoption removes cause-and-effect continuum

   

 


 

  Updated 5 July, 2009                 top See Our Privacy Statement | Contact Us